Prairie View

This is the first week since treatment started March 1 that I have not left the farm. I still go up and down the stairs several times a day and venture out to my garden and back, but I think it might even be too much to walk all the way down to the mailbox– though I might try that later.

Sunday we celebrated my birthday. In the morning my good friend Maryjude came out and weeded two tomato beds. I sat on a stool between the rows and visited for about an hour before I had to go in and take a break. In the afternoon, the other two couples on the farm and a close friend and her two sons came over to weed the rest, cut the garlic scapes, and pull out the jungle of overgrown greens in the cold frame. Kevin even did some serious weed whacking around the borders of the new fence (without slicing through it!) and along the potatoes. Again, I was able to join and visit about an hour. Afterward we had snacks on the screen porch and they all had some carrot cake (which did not taste as good to me as I hoped it might). I managed to fulfill my promise of cold beer and lemonade, though Amy brought the bulk of the snacks. I did enjoy a sweet pear and also steak for dinner!

Mostly I’ve been viewing things from our lovely screen porch. It’s hard to nap out there with all the diverse bird song (!) but I have a good view of the critters– groundhog, squirrels, chipmunks, deer, hawks, orioles, goldfinches, and now and then that daggum giant rabbit running at top speed across the back of the prairie.

spiderwort

But today, although I didn’t make it into work because I don’t think it’s a safe to drive when you can’t feel your feet and I still tire too quickly– I wanted to get out there. Because lately I have been seeing purple. I thought I’d missed “spiderwort season,” but I did not.

The purple coneflowers last longest of the natives as cut flowers. Grey-headed coneflowers are the worst, flopping over right away. I’ve seen Alexander sunflowers out there for a couple weeks now, and just yesterday noticed yarrow for the first time out near the garden.

The truth is the prairie is still more promise than bloom, but it is also stunning. And since I’m always looking for metaphors, maybe I can see myself also as more promise than bloom right now, as I stumble to the finish line of chemotherapy. My thoughts are definitely all ahead on what I will do to rebuild and how I will get my strength and muscle tone back and what I will eat and cook. And that I will swim in cool lakes. I look forward to August rebuilding before surgery, and now for the first time in four months I find myself looking beyond surgery to think about life after that.

And today, a walk in the prairie and circling back to the garden– I forgot all about the raspberries and this looks to be a bumper crop year! I found one single ripe one and tasted its sweet tartness and the crunch of its seeds.